“We’ve decided to hire another celebrant… she’s a better fit for our lifestyle and personality.”

Ouch !

There’s something quite brutal about getting a message like that.

Not because they were wrong. Quite the opposite really;

Because, I agreed.

And honestly, that’s exactly how it should be.

Choosing the person who stands beside you on your wedding day and tells your story is not supposed to feel like hiring a supplier from a checklist.

It’s personal, massively personal.

You are choosing the person that sets the tone for one of the biggest moments of your life.

If it doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t.

I think sometimes couples worry about hurting a supplier’s feelings if they decide not to book them. 

Of course rejection stings a bit.  We’re all human. 

But the good celebrants, the ones who genuinely care about creating a meaningful ceremony, know this.  We know that not every couple is our couple

And this is a good thing.

I’ve met couples who wanted something very polished and formal. 

Couples who wanted high energy and theatrical. 

Couples who wanted a quick legal-style ceremony with very little emotion.

None of those things are wrong. 

They’re just different.

Then there are the couples who sit down with me and within ten minutes we’re talking about how they met whether that was by swiping left or in a busy bar, laughing about family dramas, crying over parents and grandparents, discussing why they hate wedding traditions and admitting they’re nervous about being the centre of attention.

That’s when I know.

Not because we’re becoming best friends. That’s not the point.

But because there is an ease.

Trust.

A feeling that they can fully be themselves.

That matters far more than people realise.

Your ceremony is not the filler before the party starts. It is the emotional heartbeat and sets the tone for the entire day. 

If you feel awkward with the person leading that start, your guests will feel it too. 

If you feel relaxed, safe and understood, that comes across and changes everything.

The right celebrant will help you to feel confident and comfortable being in the moment, at your biggest moment.  

You shouldn’t feel like you have to perform, to be another version of yourselves.

You should feel comfortable being you.

I say to couples; 

don’t just ask  “Are they good at their job?”

Ask yourselves;

Can we talk to this person easily?

Do they understand us?

Do we actually enjoy being around them?

Can we imagine standing in front of them during one of the most emotional moments of our lives?

Because chemistry and personality matters.

The way someone makes you feel matters.

And sometimes the biggest green flag is actually the confidence to walk away when it doesn’t feel quite right in those early stages.

So yes, my first reaction to that message is definitely “ouch”.

But my second reaction is respect.

Because they chose the person who felt right for them.

And that is exactly what every couple should do.

“The Ceremony Celebrant” is an experienced, independent wedding celebrant based on Spain’s beautiful northern Costa Blanca, creating relaxed, heartfelt wedding ceremonies, vow renewals and elopement ceremonies across Gandia, Oliva, Denia, Javea, Moraira, Calpe, Altea, L’ Alfàs del Pi, Albir, Villajoyosa, El Campello, Alicante and the stunning inland Jalon Valley and mountain villages. 

Our ceremonies are personal, fun and authentically you full of warmth, laughter and real connection.